mountain trip: (part 1) the long bus ride

our team took a trip to the mae hong son, a small village in the mountains of northern thailand, to put on an english camp for the local children. this is the first of a multi-post series telling about our trip and the things we did. it’s thursday night right after cell group and we are all packed into the back of the joaw ford scrambling to get to the bus station. we barely make it and as we file on to the small bus everyone stares.

 
ok so we were on this bus ride up to the mountains. it was eight hours long in this little cramped seat that was not exactly what i call sleep friendly. this was an overnight bus ride by the way (8pm-4am). adding insult to injury the road up to the mountains was a combination of the road to camp of the hills and a roller-coaster. anyway drew and i were crammed in this two seat row, knees squeezed behind the chair and he's not feeling well either. eventually some people get off (did i mention we were constantly starting and stopping), so i moved to a three seat row with one other thai guy to let drew stretch out some (however, one stop later a thai guy, possibly drunk, sat next to him in the spot i moved from). the funny part though is that the thai guy (let's call him bob) that was next to me pulled down his bag and put it in the window seat. so i'm in the aisle seat, bob's in the middle, and his bag is in the far seat. smart move for bob, he could now protect his bag and use it to support him as he slept... nope. bob fell asleep alright, but he did so on me. at first it was no biggie. he just did the kind of leaning thing, which i could ignore. then his head dropped to my shoulder. i couldn't take it anymore. it was too funny. i had to show julie who was on the other side of the aisle from me. she started to crack up. this of course led me to start to snicker... but i didn't want to wake bob up for fear of being rude and making things awkward. i couldn't help it. my shoulders started to bounce as i tried to constrain my laughter. then i let it slip, a shoulder heaving chuckle. bob jolted. still trying to hold in laughter i stared straight ahead hoping he would just readjust himself towards his bag and go back to sleep. bob did go back to sleep (almost immediately) but he forgot to lean on his bag. within minutes bob was snuggling up to me again, head drooping on my shoulder. i mustered all my strength to hold in the laughter, hoping i could use the insane curves to gently push bob back towards his bag. no luck. somehow we seemed to be making only right hand turns... i couldn't help it. i tried, really i did, but all my compressed laughter shifted from my mouth and my gut to my shoulders. uncontrollably they began to gyrate up and down at the speed of laughter. bob's head bounced up from the shoulder blow.

 
now before i continue there are two things i need to paint clearly in your mind. first off, i have very bony shoulders. i mean seriously whatever those two long skinny bones that go across your chest are called they basically come out to make spikes on the place that bob's temples were resting. secondly, this may be unknown to those who have not had a class with a cadet from the corp at texas a&m university but there is a strange phenomena that happens sometimes when someone is sleep deprived but forced to sit upright. i don't know the medical term for it but basically as the head starts to drift slowly downward it picks up speed due to the increased torque provided by the direction of gravity and the increasing angle of the neck. at a given point the pull becomes too great and tension forces suddenly fail. for the unconscious sleeper this means a rapid downward jerk. the spike in acceleration instantly wakes up the body and allows for a last instant recovery flinging the head back upwards, allowing renewed vertical repositioning. unfortunately this instantaneous jolt of down and up motion is not able to revive the sleeper longer than a few seconds so the process repeats. the resulting effect is a human bobble head. (now that i think about it that might be the scientific term "bobble-head syndrome". on a side note this is made even more hilarious when the sleeping corp member is in a chair that has a bending back. imagine a backwards bobble-"upper body" effect on the front row of class as a professor is giving a lecture.)

but now back to bob. so out of some freak coincidence the frequency of my shoulder gyrations and bob's... bobbling matched perfectly with a 180 degree phase shift. in other words my shoulder would spike bob's head up in the air and as his head went up my shoulder would go down and as his head came back down my shoulder would be heaving up to meet his head. this probably happened a handful of times but the utter ridiculousness of it made it seem like it lasted for a good minute. eventually the blunt trauma was enough to wake bob up to slightly reposition as i continued to hold in my laughter (i assumed it wasn't polite to laugh uproariously on a bus full of sleeping thais). then the spinning cogs in my mind came to a brilliant conclusion. how could i solve the problem of bob's bobbling? i would just lean forward slightly, resting my head on the back of the seat in front of me and then as he slid my direction on the next big curve nothing would be there to catch him and he would be forced to come up with a less socially awkward sleeping arrangement. i don't know if the curve was just not big enough or if the muscles in bob's slumbering body were just strong enough to resist the forces, but the quick slide into nothingness plan i had devised was less than successful. instead bob had gently drifted from a mostly upright position to a mostly prone position behind me. that's right my plan to avoid an uncomfortable situation resulted in a short thai man lounging across my back at 3 in the morning in a dark bus with the top of his head just barely peaking into the aisle. i signaled julie again and she almost died. at this point my laughter was quelled by the total unease i felt. bob eventually woke up, but didn't say anything to me. we both just pretended nothing had happened. i knew that i was called to be a bridge and a magnet to the thai people but i didn’t expect that role to be played out so… literally. and that is how our trip to the mountains started.